My people are “Born to Kvetch”. We’re serving enormous numbers of people enormous amounts of deli and the vast majority leave happy. Others? Don’t. And they’re sure to let me know which is fine. In fact, its better than fine. It’s tough to be in this business and reconcile yourself to doing a good job 90 or 95% of the time. You simply can’t make everyone happy, get everyone everything they asked for when they asked for it no matter how much you might like to.
Shit happens. Sending me obnoxious messages that starts with “I’m from Montreal and I know deli” or the equally ridiculous “I’m from New York and I know deli” and proceeding to tell me how terrible my food or service or both is and are compared with the delis of these other cities is laughable from every perspective. In fact, dearly beloved reader, I got an email today from some photog at NOW Magazine asking if he can come shoot me on Wednesday in advance of Steven Davey’s review. Fucker. How can you review a deli after a week in business? That’s so unbelievably unfair. Am I whining? Victim of my own press? Oh aren’t we smug.
I’ve just read the last paragraph. I think the long hours are affecting me. It’s only Week 2. At least all the gear is working and the menu will be back in business tomorrow with the turkeys having been smoked today. The team is taking shape too. I have to tell you, the last three days have been fantastic. Imagine this: if we get 90% of our customer’s order’s right that means that over 50 people will have had a less than perfect experience – some outright awful. My heart goes out to those people but the best I can hope is that they let me know while they’re still in the deli. Posting anonymously online is for cowards.
I’m thrilled with the food quality. I still have a huge problem with my smokers and their capacity/consistency but everything else is going well. Timing and temperatures are an issue but those are getting better. My staff really want to get this right and we’ve all been a little (a lot) overwhelmed by how quickly people keep coming. Don’t get me wrong: I’m grateful to everyone who comes in the first few weeks but we’re going to mess up sometimes.
Had something funny happen tonight. Vishanti tells me that “Dr. Soandso” wanted a word with me inside – I was enjoying catching up with some old friends on the patio. The good doctor informed me that he objected to the way Naomichi uses his hand to hold the meat while he slices it. ”He should use a fork,” he said. ”Yeah” I said, “I’d like him to use the meat fork but he learned to slice this way at the Monarch and its a hard habit to unlearn.” ”It’s disgusting,” said Dr. Soandso. I gave him a face. ”When you see patients you wash first?” I asked “Yes,” he said. ”And then you touch them with your bare hands?” I asked. ”Yes,” he said. ”There’s no difference”,” I said. ”But that’s not how they do it at Schwatrz’s,” he said. I gave him the face again and then I picked him up by his collar and threw him through that window in the front with the picture of me. No I didn’t really.
In the words of my father and to all my friends from other places who want my deli to be just like the deli they loved so much at home: “If you want home-cooking… eat at home.”
