A few weeks ago I finally got to see Paul Marks, an Orthopedic surgeon who kept me waiting 13 months for an appointment.  The meeting itself was a bit of a letdown (I got a lecture on the state of the health care system in Ontario and eHealth Ontario in particular) however he booked me for surgery to clean up my knee a couple of weeks from now.  The recovery shouldn’t be too long so I expect to be up and at ‘em in time for the new store opening in August.  In the meantime, I figure it’ll be hard for me to climb the stairs at the Monarch so I’ll spend my time supervising the reno.

Believe it or not, the reno is the bright spot in an otherwise painful existence at the moment.  Beyond my knee I’ve developed this ache in my neck and back that I’m pretty sure is stress related.  I’ve been for two massages, two chiropractic appointments, accupuncture and regular old western medicine c/o my doctor.  Nothing seems to work and the pain is great enough that I haven’t had a decent night’s sleep in over a month (hence sitting here at 3 am kvetching to anyone who will listen).

Stress?  What do I have to feel stress over right?  (lol) I am making the critical leap for this business from a small success to something more substantial and the risk is obvious.  Can I maintain the high level of quality and service with a bigger menu in the new space?   Will people continue to support us the way they have at the Monarch?  Obviously, time will tell, but these are the thoughts that preoccupy me.  

At the same time, the move feels “beshert” – meant to be.  The space is two doors over from my great-grandfather Ben Caplan’s hardware store and down the street from my other great-grandparent’s store called Robert’s 5 and Dime.  I was unaware of this last connection until my cousins Bobby and Mark Goodman came into the deli with their spouses Shelley and Janet, respectively.  It always gives me great pleasure to have my family around and Bobby in particular filled in some blanks for me.  

I’ve mentioned previously that, growing up, my immediate family was never very warm to the idea of my owning a restaurant.  I always felt that their attitude stemmed from my grandmother’s experience as a young women.  In her last days she told me she was courted by a young man whose family owned a very successful restaurant called the “Romanian Grill”.  However, when he would call on her, my Nana’s father would announce “Thelma, that waiter is here to see you.”  It was made clear to her that such a man was not good enough for her and she broke off the relationship.  I came to believe that this unfortunate bias was passed on to me and struggled against it until recently.

Interestingly, that “waiter’s” son is Bobby’s best friend and Bobby confirmed the story and added some heartbreaking details.  He told me that when the man passed away, he still had jewelry that he had bought for my grandmother and wanted her to have.  Bobby and Shelley told me “they were in love” and knowing that my Nana’s marriage to my Papa wasn’t a very happy one, this story serves as a reminder that sometimes our parents are wrong.  While they may think they know what’s best for us, its far more important that we live our own lives – come what may.

I’m going to try get a few hours sleep.

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